


Say Nothing

by Bexshire



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Abuse, Dark Loki (Marvel), Dom Loki (Marvel), Emotional Manipulation, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Kidnapping, Mind Games, Rape/Non-con Elements, Sex, Vaginal Sex
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-09
Updated: 2020-12-30
Packaged: 2021-03-07 16:27:37
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 10
Words: 15,036
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26910625
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bexshire/pseuds/Bexshire
Summary: As the newest member of the avengers you feel you have to prove yourself so you take on the challenge of interrogating Loki but he has other plans for you.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes & Reader, Loki (Marvel)/Reader, Peter Parker/Reader
Comments: 12
Kudos: 85





	1. The begining

_**Darkness is all around you as you fight to find some sort of familiarity within your surroundings. Nothing. A hand shoots out and grasps your own, long slim fingers wrap around your wrist and pulls you towards its owner. Suddenly your body is pressed against his a vicious smirk creaps onto his lips and a chuckle escapes them “soon”.** _

You’re awoken by the suns light streaming in through your window it takes all your will power to get out of bed, Bucky is waiting to train with you in the training room and you’re already late. Fuck. Quickly you put on your training outfit, tight leggings with a stripe down each side with a tank top wore over your sports bra. Hoping he hasn't been waiting too long you sheepishly walk into the training room. “what’s your excuse this time Y/L/N” a mocking tone in his voice seemingly pointing out your constant late arrivals to your sessions.

“sorry, slept in” hoping he wouldn't be too mad with you sweeten your words with a nervous smile. Already used to your behaviour he lets it go.

“let’s see what you’ve got then” you were glad he had forgiven you, to be fair 6am was way too early for him to expect you to be up but it was the time he allocated for your sessions together and you were grateful for the time spent together. Bucky and you were fast friends after your move to the avengers compound after Tony took you in. He never took it easy on you though. The next two hours were filled with you getting knocked on your ass a few times but for the most part you could keep up with the super solider even besting him quite a few times, way more than usual but you were sure it was only because he let you. Noting the lack of spectators to your successes you ask him where the others were as it was unlike them to miss a morning workout.

“they’re out on a last minute mission, Loki was sighted on Earth and they were already out on their previous mission” nodding your head you recalled Steve telling you about how he, Thor, Tony, Nat, Wanda and Bucky were going out to take out a crime ring causing problems in Italy.

“weren’t you supposed to go with them Buck” you asked confused as to why he was the only one here.

“I’m injured” he replied pointing towards his leg, you had noticed him limping a bit but you thought nothing of it. “perhaps that's why you kept beating me today”.

“hah you wish” giving him a playful punch to the arm as you said it. “do you think they’ll catch Loki this time”

“I don’t know he has evaded us every single time we have go after him lately but the tip off to his location was pretty recent so I think they have a good chance” as if on cue F.R.I.D.A.Y informed you both that they had returned. With a prisoner.

You and Bucky went to meet the others at the Quinjet. Sam, Peter, Bruce and Vision met you there. As they left the jet your eyes darted around to catch a glimpse of the prisoner. One by one the avengers stepped off the jet leaving just Thor inside and that's when you see him. Loki. Immediately his green eyes pierce into your own before his gaze is pulled from you when Thor roughly pushes him off the jet. “clearly this has been some big misunderstanding I meant no trouble I was just popping in for a visit” the dark haired god spoke in a jovial manner as if he wasn't taking this seriously.

“shut up brother”

“take him to the cell” Tony huffed clearly exhausted from the double mission he has just undertaken. “everyone meet in the conference room in 5”. Various sounds of agreements erupted and everyone headed down to the meeting spot. You made you way over to Peter wondering what he thought about finally catching Loki, you knew he was mad about no going on the Italy mission and the excitement of tracking down Loki probably added to the anger.

“Morning Spidey” you offered him a smile which he copied lightly elbowing your side to show his disapproval at the nickname you had given him. “can you believe they got him?”

“Yep, I wish I had been there but no I had to focus on ‘organising our intergalactic contacts’ because that is very important and worth my time” His voice mocking Tony’s words when he told Peter he couldn't come on the mission. Tony meant well and was trying to improve Peters skill set or something, Peter didn't take being sidelined as a positive thing and had even fought with Tony because of the decision. “do you think we could sneak off before the meeting” his eyes firmly locked on your own only momentarily sneaking down to your lips.

“I’m sure we have a bit of time” you quickly pulled him into a nearby supply closet before he grabbed the back of your neck and lifted your head towards his face. The kiss was long and deep, your tongues fighting for dominance until he finally gave in. When you pulled away you both stared into each other’s eyes enjoying the feeling of being so close to someone you cared so much about. You both didn't like needing to hide your affections from the rest of the group but there is no way Tony would approve of you two and you weren’t a fan of having your personal life on display and if you came out as a couple there’s no way you could escape the onslaught of questions and comments. “I think we have to get to the meeting now” he huffed at your words before quickly giving you another peck and leading you out of the closet.

You and Peter are the last to enter the room, luckily no one seems to notice. You take your seats next to each other as Tony begins debriefing everyone on the latest mission. It’s mostly boring stuff so you don't pay much attention choosing instead to focus on the way Peter plays with his fingers while intensely focusing on Tony’s words, eventually he catches you staring and winks at you causing a chuckle to escape your lips. Tony turns to you clearly annoyed but before he can speak Peter erupts into laughter at the situation he has caused. Soon both of you are laughing while small laughs come from those around you and it takes a good few seconds for everyone to calm down. “now that we all have that out of our system can we please return to the task at hand, we have to work out what Loki’s intentions with earth are. I am going down there after this to question him, Thor and Y/N will accompany me” his words confused you, he had never selected you for such an important task before he probably wants to give you a lecture about taking meetings seriously as this was not the first meeting you and Peter had interrupted. When Tony was down he dismissed everyone leaving just you and Thor in the room with him. “Now you two this is a sensitive task so Thor don’t let him get on your nerves we have to figure out his plan”

“you clearly have never met my brother before he is ALWAYS on my nerves-“

“just don't punch him out or something okay” Thor had to think for a moment before finally agreeing.

“fine” He didn't seem to convinced by his own words. Tony turned to you, his eyes studying you for a moment.

“Now Y/N this is a new experience for you but I hope to begin improving your interrogation skills” you nod at him as he gestures for all of you to make your way to the cell Loki is being held in. You had rarely been to this section of the compound and it seemed that they had built this cells just to house the god. As you approach Loki he turns to face all of you, he stands up tall sharing a calm calculating exterior with the world. His dark hair frames his face as he glares at all of you before his face breaks into a sly smile. The cell he is in was in the middle of a massive wide open room, the walls of the cell seemed to be made of some sort of glass with a purple force field encasing the entire cube.

“welcome visitors to my cage, unfortunately I do not have any tea to offer you” he looks as though he has to keep himself from laughing at his own joke, he looks at you and you try to maintain your composure trying not to looks scared of the murderous god in front of you. “don't be scared darling I doubt I could harm you through this cage Tony has built, he seems to have been able to make it impossible for me to use my magic, which was very rude of him” when he addresses you his tone is almost comforting but it becomes sour as he turns to Tony

“Leave her alone, you know why you are here Loki, why did come to earth, what are you plans” Tony’s voice is calm and without emotion as he stares down the caged man. Loki pondered for a few moments before finally seeming to come to a decision.

“so many questions, why should I answer any of your questions when all you have done for me is beat me up and lock me in this god awful room” Loki scanned

“Brother if you do not give us the answers we seek I promise you that you will rot in here”

“how rude of you, well then I guess you give me no choice, I will reveal my plans to you on one condition” he turned to Tony knowing he would get nowhere bargaining with his brother.

“what do you want Loki” Tony asked him knowing his response would be something Tony would not give him.

“I will tell you my plans, but, I will only talk to her”. His voice echoed through the room, Tony turned to leave the room with you and Thor following only hearing Loki’s voice as you all left.

“I will be waiting here for you darling” his voice sent a shiver down your spine and you felt Tony usher you and Thor into a small meeting room just outside. Filled with a desire to make Tony see you as something other than a little girl you began to speak.

“I can do it Mr Stark, I’ll get the information from him, trust me” his face drops at your words he breathes out before he replies.

“I know you can and it’s not that I don't trust you, it just I don't trust him he is dangerous and manipulative”  
“Stark is right Y/N he will say anything to get you on his side he can get inside on anyone’s head” Thor’s warning fell on deaf ears as you had already decided you were going to do it.

“this may be the only chance we have to find out Loki’s plan, and I know what I’m doing I can handle it” Tony has to think about it for a second before he seems to agree.

“you’re right, just please, be careful”

“I will” you make your way out of the room leaving Tony and Thor in the room alone. As you approach the cell you see Loki’s eyes light up and a smile appears on his face.

“I was sure Daddy Stark wasn’t going to let you come speak to me” his teasing words bounced off you as you prepared yourself for his attempts to get inside your head. you were not too keen on speaking to him but you wanted to prove your worth to the team and securing this information would be a big help.

“why did you come to earth” you tried to sound as intimidating as possible hiding all your fear at the current situation.

“wow no pleasantries? not even a hello? I’m hurt” his tone full of sarcasm as he tried to gage your reaction.

“you know why I’m here, it’s just me that’s what you wanted, now tell me why you’re here” his face hardened as he spoke turning to a terrifying glare that pierced through your soul.

“where’s the fun it that doll, now tell me something, why did Stark take you in, what is your purpose here?” his words seems to break right through you, with each word he stared you down with more intensity and it was beginning to frighten you”

“I-uh i, we aren’t here to talk about me” you managed to break free of his stare as you attempted to regain control of the conversation “now you are going to tell me what you are doing here on earth or you will stay down here for a very long time” you tried your best to sound threatening but it wasn’t working.

“hmm I don’t think so I haven’t even had my fun with you yet” his words would have terrified you if Tony hadn’t come out from the room he was in to rescue you from your pathetic attempt at an interrogation, luckily he wouldn’t have been able to hear most of it from the room he and Thor were in.

“thats enough, let’s leave him here for a bit and pick this up tomorrow” Tony left the room first leaving you alone with Loki as you collected your thoughts and started to leave the room. you looked at him one last time and watched as he opened his mouth to speak.

“I’ll see you tonight Y/N”


	2. Together

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You spend the day with Peter but something is on your mind

His words barely register and you choose not to focus on what they mean as you make your way to the kitchens to get some food. Peter is waiting for you when you arrive and motions for you to come sit and eat with him. His smile is warm and comforting reminding you about how much you care about him. “how was it?” he turns to look at you suddenly picking up on the expression of discomfort on your face. “Y/N are you okay, what happened”.

“I couldn't get him to talk, I failed everyone Peter” he takes his hands in yours and holds them tight. With this simple act you already feel so much better and you long for him to take you into his arms where you feel the most safe.

“hey, you did your best and if Loki didn't wanna talk then he wasn't going to, do beat yourself up about it okay” he looked up at you trying to elicit a smile out of you, you were powerless to stop you lips spreading wide across you face. “that's more like it”. At that moment Bucky came to sit across from you two, stuffing a chicken sandwich into his mouth you took the moment to remind him of you multiple victories over him during your training earlier that morning.

“Hey Parker did Bucky tell you how I beat his ass constantly during our training this morning” you gave the super solider a jesting look as he raised his finger at you to correct your statement.

“I’ll have you know that she only beat me because I am injured and I still knocked her down a few times”

“excuses excuses” you retorted

“Damn Bucky that’s pretty embarrassing for ya” Peter’s voice tainted with a mocking tone.

“like you can talk, I’ve never seen you beat her once little spider”

“hey that's Mr spider to you” all three of you laughed as you finished your food before going about your days.

You and Peter slipped off to your room to get some alone time again. “are you feeling better now Y/N?” His voice was cautious but reassuring and you felt safe when he was around.

“so much better”

“that's good, now I wonder if there’s anything for us to do here together” a playful smile making its way onto his face. You pulled him towards you and kissed him passionately.

“I’m sure we can think of something” you both fall to the bed utterly enveloped in each other’s arms. You kiss his neck and playfully bite it while he fumbles with your button up shirt. You help him remove your shirt and bra exposing your naked chest to him. He quickly rips of his shirt exposing his muscular chest. You could get used to this view. He unzips his pants revealing his already hardening cock. Grinning at the sight you remove your own pants and jump on top of him. leading the way you guide his member inside yourself silently cursing as it makes its way past your entrance.

“fuck Y/N you feel so good” he moans, as he bottoms out inside you, you start to ride him, slowly at first before picking up the pace. Soon you’re almost exhausted but the waves of pleasure growing inside of you keep you going. As he continually hits the sensitive spot inside you it becomes clear that you are close to orgasming and judging by Peters face he is close to.

“I’m gonna cum Peter” Hearing those words and feeling you clench around him sets him off as he begins to cum to. You both ride out your orgasms before you fall on top of him, nestling into the crook of his neck.

“you’re amazing Y/N” you stared up into his brown eyes are you thought about how lucky you were to be with him.

“I’m sure you say that to all your girls” he playfully swats your head holds you tighter.

“you know you’re the only one for me, I don't care what anyone else would think or if it would affect the team. I love you” your heart fills with joy as you realise the immensity of his words and you know that you feel the same way.

“I love you Peter, but you know what Tony thinks about dating within the team” your mind flashes back to Tony’s rage when he discovered that Natasha and Bruce were conducting a secret affair. It was Tony’s outrage and their suspension from going on missions together that eventually broke them up and you were damned if you were going to let someone get between you and Peter.

“he just wants the whole team to be safe and to be sure that no one has any divided interests” in truth in was a stupid rule but you were both fine keeping your relationship a secret. Secrets are fun right.

The rest of the day is a blur and you can’t help but think back to Loki’s final words to you. “I’ll see you tonight Y/N” did he think you were going back to question him that night, surely Tony would leave him there longer before questioning him again and he certainly wouldn’t be taking you.

Night falls fast as you ready yourself for bed as you slip into your bed it becomes harder to drag your mind from Loki’s comments part of you wants to go down to his cells just to ask what he meant, is this what he wanted, to torment you.

You had always struggled to find rest and most nights you could spend hours tossing and turning but tonight was different. It was like Loki had slithered his way into your thoughts making it impossible for you to fall asleep. You decided to go down to Peters room to see if he was awake and possibly to crawl into bed with him, but as you consciously made the decision to leave you fell asleep. During the night you’re visited again by the darkness but this time it feels strangely familiar.

**_“Hello Y/N, open your eyes” you obey but it takes a second to work out what is going on around you. All you see is darkness all around you, except for the tall silhouette before you. Your eyes adjust to the light and you finally see him._ **

**_Loki_ **

**_“what’s the matter doll, don’t look so frightened” his words cut through you like a knife and you try to scream but you can't. “you can't scream here, you can't even run. I make the rules”. You try to turn and run but it’s not use. Even if you had control of your body you would have to fight against his strong grip around your arms. Each of his hands wrapped around your wrists, his nails digging into your flesh as you stood opposite him. His grip tightens as he pulls you closer bringing his face dangerously close to your own. He moves his lips to your ears and begins to whisper. “you’re mine now, your mind belongs to me and you will do what I say”_ **


	3. His plan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki keeps invading your dreams and still refuses to tell you him plan.

Your whole body aches as you pull yourself awake. Your mind cloudy as you try to shake the feeling of being watched. You think back to your dream. It was just a dream right. Tony had made sure the cell made Loki’s powers useless yet you were still consumed by his words and as you looked over to the clock beside your bed and saw 3:17am you could only bring yourself to do one thing.

You had to go to Loki.

It’s a bad idea but you have already made and it feels like you couldn’t stop yourself from going to him if you tried. You quickly dress yourself and you suddenly find your feet moving briskly towards the room where Loki is being kept. As you make your way to him you try to convince yourself to turn around knowing this can’t end well but no matter how hard you try you can’t turn yourself around you don't even want to in fact, you want to get there faster. You start walking faster now that you’ve made your way past the rest of the avengers apartments and it doesn't take you too long before you’re at the entrance to the room with Loki’s cell. Hesitantly you step into the room trying to organise your thoughts. What were you going to say to him. His eyes met your and you immediately realised you had made the wrong choice coming here. The cruel smile on his face informed you of all you needed to know. He wanted you to come here. “Nice to see that you finally decided to show up, I was getting oh so lonely without you” his words scared you and you tried to stop your hands from shaking but it was no use.

  
“what do you want from me Loki and how did you get into my dreams” your voice almost failing as you struggled to even say his name.

“oh darling, your mind is very weak it was no trouble at all, but don't worry I will fix you and by the way, sorry about your wrists” you looked down to your hands and the sight made you wince dark bruises circled you wrists and what appeared to be nail marks cut deep into the flesh.

“I don’t understand, what did you do to me” a tear falling down your cheek as you look up at the man who held so much power over you.

“I haven’t done anything to you… yet” as your breathing grows more rapid you suddenly realise the danger you are in, you demand to know his intension with you.

“tell me what you want with me, why are you doing this” barely holding back tears you barely managed to choke out all the words

“isn’t it obvious what I want darling” he stopped speaking for a moment clearly enjoying the terror he was inflicting on you. “I want you, and I always get what I want” his words were evil and you tried with all you might to turn and run away he couldn't control you, you wouldn't let him.

“Leave me alone” the words barely escape your lips and Loki give a chuckle.

“come now Y/N you were the one that came to see me, but don't worry, you’ll be back”

“leave me alone” you practically shout as you manage to break free from his glare. Quickly beginning to move out of the room. This annoys the caged god and he shouts back.

“you can’t leave me, you’re mine!” anger filled the air when he spoke as he brought your mind back to your dream. So it was him. Running through the compound hoping no one was up to catch your dazed sprinting you debated whether you should tell Peter what was happening, but that would mean involving Tony which would mean telling him you went to go see Loki and you were not about to do that. Eventually you made it to your room and curled up under you covers to scared to sleep because of who might be waiting for you in your dreams. As the hours past you couldn't hold off sleeping any longer and you peacefully drifted away.

**_“welcome back dear, I knew you couldn’t resist me for long” you fought to speak but you still couldn't make a sound. “I have big plans for you, together we are going to achieve so much” fighting to wake yourself up or do anything to escape him, you manage to turn your head away from him but this only angers him more. “it’s time to wake up doll, I’ll see you soon”_ **

****

you bottled awake sitting up straight covered it sweat and tears, this couldn't be happening. You wanted to run into Peters arms but Loki’s warning rang loud in your ears and you were petrified of what he would do. Looking at the clock you saw that it was 6:15 maybe you wouldn't be late to training with Bucky for once, the thought of beating him down to the gym was enough to get you up and dressed. You made sure to put on a long sleeved shirt to hide the marks on your wrists, there’s no way you would be able to explain those if you were asked. On your way to the gym you passed Thor and he gave you a cheerful smile. “I hope my brother didn't get to you too much, he can be a real pain” he says trying to judge your reaction. Putting on your bravest face to hide your true fear you reply.

“yeah I’ll be fine, and besides he is locked in that cell, what’s the worst he can do” Thor accepts your response leaving you to walk down to the gym in peace. Walking through the doors you see that Bucky is not there yet and decide to do some warm ups before he arrives.

“well well well, I thought I’d never see the day, Y/N has beaten me to the gym” he laughs after he finishes but he does seems genuinely impressed.

“I just thought that since I’m so much better than you now I should get here early to do some real training before you came and slowed me down” you try squaring up to the super solider but he is over a foot taller than you and easily pushes you out of the way. Still laughing he says.

“oh ha ha yeah let’s see if you’re still so full of confidence after I knock you to the ground a hundred times” he playfully punches your arm as you both line up to fight. He comes at you hard and fast but you’ve seen him fight 1000 times so you expertly duck to the side and side swipe his legs, knocking him over. He falls down with a huff as you stand over the super soldier his groans. “I let you have that”

“sure you did Bucko” he grabs you ankle and pulls it out from under you causing you to crash to the floor on top of him. “hey that’s unfair!” you yell after having the wind knocked out of you.

“still counts shorty” you hated his nickname for you but you couldn't argue that your below average height was only exaggerated by his towering stature which had been enhanced by the super serum giving to him by hydra.

You went head to head against him a few more times, regrettably he beat you most times but on occasion you managed to gain the upper hand and best him. “tired out yet Y/N” you were absolutely puffed but you weren’t about to tell him that, his endurance was incredibly and he could probably last the whole day. you tried to last a few more rounds but it was becoming obvious you were completely spent, he beat you easily each time. “haha I’ll let you go now, go grab some breakfast pancakes or something”

while you were insulated by his tone you were grateful for the invitation to leave “see ya next week Buck” walking out of the gym you could hear him absolutely destroying the punching bag. They have to replace that bag a couple times a week due to it being attacked constantly by not one but two super soldiers. As you looked down the long corridor your mind drifted to Loki and his threats. What does he want from you, you couldn't help but imagining him snickering at the knowledge of himself occupying your thoughts. A wave of terror overtakes you and you long to be in Peters arms, he was probably in his room sleeping in so you make your way back to the apartments reserved for the avengers. Tentatively you knock at his door awaiting his reply to let you in. “It's me Peter” he lets out a groan of approval and you open his door to find the 21 year old sprawled out across his bed. You snuggle into his arms as he wraps you up into a hug and for the first time in hours you feel safe. You desperately want to tell about Loki but you can’t. Already exhausted from your early morning workout it doesn't take you long to fall asleep.

**_“Morning doll” his voice fills you with dread as you wonder what he could possibly want from you. “it's time you hear of my plan. Tonight you will come and release me from this cell and we will leave together, don’t even think about telling anyone of our plan, I will know and you don't want to make me mad” you looked up at the man invading your dreams you were certain you would not release him but he seemed convinced that you would listen to him. his figure engulfed you as you struggled to free yourself from his grasp but it was no use._ **

****

“Y/N wake up! It’s just a dream, it’s just me, I’m here with you, you’re safe now” Peter holds you tightly in his arms as you fight away Loki’s words. You know what he wants you to do and you know that you won’t do what he asks, it's not like he can control you.


	4. Control

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The time has come for Loki's plan, can you overcome his attempts to control you.

“are you alright” his voice fraught with worry as he holds you you. You don't answer him but you allow him to wrap himself around you. You try to hold back the tears that come streaming down your face but it’s no use. He holds your trembling form and tries to calm you down with his words but you can't hear them through the sounds of your whimpering.

“I’m sorry” you stare up into his eyes and he watches a tear fall down your cheeks before pressing his forehead to yours.

“You’ve done nothing wrong Y/N it was just a dream. Nothing can hurt you here” his words soothe your crying and you start to feel better. You look over to the clock and you see that you and Peter have slept in and it’s now just past 12pm. He helps you out of bed and hold your arms as you stare into each other’s eyes. “what happened” his soft eyes offering you comfort as he speaks.

“it was just a bad dream I guess” you give him a weak smile which he returns making you feel a lot better. You both walk out of his room hand in hand before quickly releasing each other when you hear footsteps coming from around the corner. Tony comes around looking both of you up and down.

“Perfect, you two are just who I wanted to see” he smiled at both of you but you were too on edge that he would work out you secret to reciprocate it. Luckily Peter was full of positive energy it just radiated out of him, it’s one of the things you love most about him.

“What did you need Mr Stark?” His question breaking the silence that had begun to envelop you.

“oh nothing much I was just wondering what you two were up to, didn’t see either of you at the kitchens for breakfast” before you could even think to panic about Tony’s line of questioning Peter offers a response.

“we just slept in I guess, I hope no one has finished all the milk” His answer satisfies Tony and he lets you leave in peace.

You spend the day with Peter helping him through all the tasks Tony had given him, you loved working with him and you were thankful for the distraction. You promised yourself you wouldn't see Loki again and you tried to push his ‘plan’ from your mind. How could he think that you would release him that was absolutely out of the question. As the afternoon came you felt better and you went to the kitchens to prepare dinner for yourself and Peter. Before too long most of the avengers were in the kitchen making dinner. Bucky enters the room and sits himself in front of you. “What’s for dinner shorty”

“that's chef shorty to you, and I’m making pasta, none for you though” he always tried to get you to make him food for you and normally you would but you only had just enough pasta for you and Peter.

“hey! How come.”

“because if I was making some for you I would have to quadruple the recipe” Somehow the super serum must have also increased his appetite tenfold because that man could eat enough to fed 5 armies.

“fair” he retreated from the bench and found some leftover pizza. You finish making the pasta and you bring two bowls over to the table where Peter is sitting. He wolfs down the pasta muttering praises as he eats it. When you both have finished he accompanies you to wash the bowls and cutlery. When you head to your rooms you part ways, you had both decided a while ago that it was too risky to sleep overnight with each other although you desperately wanted Peter to sleep with you tonight.

As you make your way under the covers you can't help but remember what Loki wants from you. A part of you wanted to go down to him and tell him you wouldn't even dream of letting him out, but you thought better of it. As you drift to sleep you feel something pulling you towards it, you fight the feeling and tell yourself it’s nothing and you close your eyes.

**_“Come on Y/N, it’s time”_ **

****

You open your eyes and you have to stop yourself from screaming out because you find yourself halfway down the hallway. You’ve never been one to sleep walk, you try to turn around but you find your feet continuing down the corridor. NO. STOP. You think to yourself fighting your own body. You have no idea what’s happening but there’s only one explanation. Loki. You feel like screaming or crying but nothing happens, you just keep walking. Before too long you have made it to the room holding Loki’s cell. Every fibre of you being begging your body to turn around or for you to wake up and have this all be just a dream.

“I told you you couldn't leave me” his voice terrifies you as you lock eyes with him. you find yourself making your way to the control centre from the cell. “that's it, now just get me out of here”. Fighting his mind control you manage to speak.

“please, no” he seems shocked that you were able to talk but that doesn't hold his attention for long as before you know it you’ve typed in the code and the force field holding Loki in lifts and he steps out of the cell. Now that he is unrestrained he is even more terrifying to you. He steps forward, his body inches from you own.

“Good girl, thank you for releasing me, now for the fun part” desperately you try to escape his control over you, you a feel tear streaming down you face and he delicately raises a finger to your cheek and dries it off. “don't worry doll, I’m not going to hurt you” a few distant sounds from across the compound seem to spook him as he prepares the next move. “it’s time for us to leave” he grasps you hand and breaks off into a sprint. You try to resist but your feet are already sprinting with him. As you make you way to the exit. Blocking your way you see the shape of a person, as you get closer you can clearly make it out as Peter. A wave of relief rushes over you which quickly turns sour as you he turns to see you running with Loki.

  
“what are you doing Y/N” fear clouding his words. you try to yell back to him telling him that Loki is somehow controlling your movements, you want to tell him to call for Tony but you can’t. Tears fall down your face as Loki grabs you tighter and Peter stands tall ready to fight. Suddenly Loki’s voice cuts through the crushing silence.

“fight him”

You can't fight Peter, you won’t. Yet you feel your body walk towards him as he looks at you with nothing but confusion and betrayal you tell yourself that he has to know that you are not doing this on purpose, that Loki is making you do this. You’re standing right in front of him now and your body moves to punch him. “Y/N” his voice is more of a soft plea begging you to stop as he blocks you attack. You grab his shoulders and throw him against the wall trying desperately to tell him you’re sorry but it’s no use. He backs away from you but whatever Loki has done to you forces you to follow him. “what are you doing” his eyes are tearing up as he reaches for your arms to hold you down. You pull them from his grasp and push kick him in the stomach sending him stumbling backwards barely able to stand. Tears are now streaming down your face as you move towards him. “Y/N stop this… please” he begs as you punch him across the jaw. There’s blood on your hands now and you try desperately to fight against Loki’s mind control but it’s no use. You are completely at his mercy. Peter is so shaken from your last blow that he is powerless to stop your next strike. He falls to the ground bent over but Loki isn’t done with him you feel yourself walk over to him terrified about what Loki will make you do, when suddenly Tony and the rest of the avengers appear. You can see the look on their faces as they watch you stand over Peters limp body. Tony rushes forward and sees Loki standing with you.

“Y/N. what have you done”

you fight against Loki’s control but he is too powerful you manage to choke out a muffled “I’m sorry” but you can't tell if they heard you they must think you did this on purpose what else would they think. Loki grabs your hand again running off out of the compound. Tony and the other avengers rush to Peters side before a few of them try to go after you and Loki.

“Let her go” Tony says holding Peter in his arms taking him to the infirmary.

“but what abou-” Thor interjects before Tony cuts him off

“I said let her go!”


	5. A new kind of nightmare

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After you escape the Avengers compound you realise the true extent of Loki desires

You wanted to scream for help but your mouth was not your own. You were powerless to do anything but follow him. you can't even turn your head back to see your friends, they must hate you now you think. Your mind turns to Peter, how badly had you hurt him, would he ever be able to trust you again. Still running with Loki he tightens his grip on your arm as he pulls you through the gates of the compound. You wonder where he is taking you and how was he controlling your movements. You managed to close your eyes hoping that when you opened them you would awake in your bed. It was no use, this was real.

It feels like you have been running for hours but your legs don’t feel tired, still, your breathing is erratic and you feel like you might faint.

After what seems like forever he suddenly stops running and turns to you, his eyes wild and feral. He puts his hands on your shoulders grasping you tightly. “hold on” he says as you are enveloped within a white flash of light. The feeling is strange and you feel your feet leave the ground. Suddenly your feet touch the ground but you aren’t where you were before. Loki must have used his powers to teleport you both.

You look around and you are surrounded by trees and in front of you is a small wooden cottage. “they’ll never think to look for us here” he smiles wide and you feel yourself forced walk into the cottage with him. As you enter you see how neatly decorated the place is. In the centre of the room lies a massive regal looking rug, there is a fire place and a very quaint looking kitchen. You look around the room and find that you have some control of you movements. Immediately you try to dash for the door but your body betrays you and you find that you’re frozen in space.

“Let me go” You’re able to talk freely although you still try to regain control of your body.

“Now why would I do that, we are going to accomplish so much together” he places a finger under your chin lifting your head to his.

“I will never help you” he isn’t surprised by your words but he is still annoyed by them.

“You have no idea what I can make you do” his words take on a cruel tone as he grasps your jaw tightly with his hand. Fear courses through your body as he pushes you against the wall trapping you between his arms. An evil smile emerges across his face as he looks you up and down like a meal.

A mix of fear and adrenaline courses through you as you are able to break his hold on you and push him back. You start sprinting for the door but it’s too late. He grabs the back of your shirt and pulls you back to him. Grabbing your neck he pushes you against the wall again, Fighting to breathe you struggle under his grasp. His face moves dangerously close to yours. “I’m going to enjoy this”. He moves his free hand slowly up your inner thigh. He relaxes his grip on your throat allowing you to breathe for a second before he quickly tightens it again. He suddenly puts his lips on yours forcing his tongue into your mouth. You try to resist the kiss but he must be in control of your body again. He takes his hand off your throat and grabs both your shoulders dragging you into the small bedroom. He throws you onto the bed before climbing on top of you.

“please, no” the words are strained as you fight against him with the last of you strength. He holds your arms above your head with ease, even without his mind control he could easily overpower you. His places his thigh between your legs slowly applying more pressure.

“you could enjoy this too if you let yourself” tears well up in your eyes as he tears your clothes off. You are powerless to stop him and are completely at his mercy. He takes his hand off your arms but you are still unable to move them as if he is still holding them there. He moves his hand down between your legs. He delicately brushes his fingers over your inner thighs. He stares into your eyes as he runs a finger along your slit. Before too long he begins rubbing your clit, circling your sensitive bud. You fell yourself getting wetter and wetter Loki seems to notice and begins undoing his pants. You couldn't speak or move as he pushes his cock against your entrance. Without mercy he slams himself into you, before you could react to the searing pain he pulls out, before quickly slamming back in. you find that you are able to scream but this only encourages Loki. He begins fucking you roughly.

“Stop!” you yell but he only laughs. He speeds up and starts using a hand to play with you clit. No matter how hard you fight it you feel a wave of pleasure build within you. As you come closer to your climax Loki notices and picks up the pace once more.

“that’s it, cum for me, show me how good I am to you” you try to hold it in but it’s too much waves of pleasure erupt over you as you scream out from the feeling. You feel yourself clench around him and Loki cums inside you. He slows down until he finally pulls out of you, he brings his face to yours. “now thank me for making you cum like the little slut you are” you try to refuse his orders but you realise you are already speaking.

“thank you for making me cum like the little slut I am” you want to scream as you try to fight the words coming out of your mouth that are not your own.

“why do you look so scared doll?” you couldn't answer him but you have to assume he is just being cruel, why would he expect you to be anything other than completely terrified. “You’ve seen nothing yet, would you like to see what real fear is” his expression hardens as you see true evil flash across his eyes. He firmly presses his forearm across you neck making it impossible for you to breathe. His face comes up close to yours and you can feel his breath on your skin. You feel yourself beginning to lose consciousness as he smiles coldly over you. “good night Y/N”

**_You find yourself in a hallway, trying to find your bearings your, head whips around from side to side until you see Loki. He is quite a ways down the corridor and he is holding a knife. He offers you an evil smirk and walks towards another figure, you squint trying to make out the rough silhouette. Peter. You start running towards Loki desperately trying to stop him from stabbing the man you love but it’s too late. He slashes Peters throat with the knife before disappearing into the shadows. “NO!” you continue running towards Peter as you see the blood pouring out of him, but it’s no use, no matter how far you run you are not getting any closer to Peter. You watch helplessly as he bleeds out. He calls out for you but you can't hear what he says over the sound of your own panting. You watch as he dies._ **

****

**_Suddenly you bolt awake into another nightmare, this time you and Peter are standing alone in an open field. You walk over to him but he flinches away. “get away from me” his voice filled with fear in the distance you see Loki walking towards both of you holding the same knife._ **

****

**_“please Peter you have to come with me, he will kill you” you try to grab his hands but he pulls away again._ **

****

**_“I will never trust you again after what you’ve done” Loki is getting closer now as you beg Peter to run. He doesn't listen and you are forced to watch as Loki stabs him through the back. Peter falls to the ground and as the life leaves him he looks up at you. “what have you done”_ **

****

**_You open your eyes to a new situation where you watch Peter die. Every time he dies you find yourself somewhere else watching him die all over again. At first it is Loki killing him but after a dozen times you see yourself killing Peter. The look of betrayal in his eyes hurts you to your core as you are forced to watch on unable to save him. You are trapped in this nightmare for what feels like hours as you see Peter die at your hand what has to be hundreds of times._ **

****

You find yourself abruptly pulled from the nightmare still in Loki’s bed. He is right there next to you. “I hope you’ve learnt a valuable lesson Y/N. If you ever try to leave me or betray me I won't just kill Peter, I’ll make you do it” the immensity of his words his you like a freight train, you were powerless to fight him.

“you are evil” you find yourself in control of your words as you look up to the god beside you.

“You shouldn’t talk to me like that, but don’t worry, you’ll come around soon enough and you will learn to love me” how could he say that, you were sure you would never feel anything but hate for Loki and although he could control your body there was no way you would let him control your mind.


	6. Stay here

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki's control over you is growing stronger by the hour, will you ever be able to escape.

You lie awake in the bed aware of the terrifying presence besides you. Maybe if you pretend to sleep he won’t do anything to you. You lie in the bed for what feels like an hour, fighting back tears. You can't stand it anymore and you figure that you may be able to escape while Loki sleeps. Slowly you creep out of the bed relived to find yourself in control of your muscles. “going somewhere darling” his words send shivers across your body and you are suddenly frozen.

“Please” tears stream your face as you try to reason with your captor.

“Come over here” You find yourself turning towards him as he holds a hand out to you. Your hand reaches out to grasp his and you want to scream at the feeling of his cold hand drawing you in. “I don’t want to hurt you, I rescued you, we will be happy together” his words leave you weak and distraught. You had to find a way to escape him but with every passing moment it seemed less and less likely that you would be able to leave. He pulls you into bed with him and to your surprise he doesn't force himself on you. You spend the morning cuddling in bed with him. A small part of you enjoys the feeling of being protected after all you’ve been through even though it was Loki that did everything to you. You fall asleep but for the first time in a while you do not dream.

When you wake you notice that Loki is gone, at first this upsets you before you regain control of your thoughts and realise this may be your last chance to escape. You make your way to the bedroom door before exiting into the main room. You desperately want to run to the door but you can’t force yourself to do it overcome with the feeling of being so close to freedom but having your own body betray you leaves you feeling broken. You breakdown crying on the floor. Before too long Loki enters the cottage and sees you on the floor. He rushes to your side and lifts you up pulling you into a hug before setting you down. “Hey, Y/N don’t cry, everything is okay, you’re safe” the most chilling part of his words is that he genuinely sounds like he means it.

“You kidnapped me and now you are holding me here and I can't leave!” your voice catches in your throat a few times and they are barley legible through your crying.

“I didn’t stop you from leaving Y/N, I was waiting for you to run outside.” His words leave you hollow as you find you do have the ability to move your body, why couldn't you leave. “It’s okay, this part was always going to be hard for you, soon you will see how much I care for you and then you will be happy.” You stare into his eyes, noting the calming affect they have on you.

“are they coming for me? The avengers I mean” you could barely stand to think about them, they would have no reason to suspect that your actions were not your own. They must hate you. What else would they have cause to think, especially Peter you knew you had hurt him badly but he has survived a lot worse physically but you were sure that emotionally he would be broken. You had broken his heart he would have to most reason to hate you now. Your question seems to have taken Loki back as he tries to find the right words.

“I don’t know. All I know is that they believe you betrayed them and they are looking to locate and capture both of us” Even though he had only said what your already knew it hurt to hear them. You knew he has some way of tracking the avengers movement so it makes sense that he knows their plans.

“They… they think I betrayed them” the realisation fills you with shame and rage, not directed at Loki, but at the avengers. You hadn’t let yourself believe it until now but the avengers hated you for what you’ve done. Didn't they know you better, Tony had basically become your surrogate father and Peter, Peter said he loved you, did he even mean it. “No, I don't believe you” Your defiant tone sets Loki off as he reaches for your arm. “Don’t touch me, I hate you” anger surges through you as you stare at the man in front of you.

“Now now, don't be like that. I am the only person that will ever truly love you” he steps closer to you once again.

“Leave me alone!” he finally reaches his breaking point and slams you against the wall of the cottage, his eyes locked on you filling with a viscous rage. Without warning he wraps a hand around your throat dragging you back into the bedroom. Fighting for air you try to loosen his grip on you by pulling at his hands. This only angers the god as he throws you to the ground. Fear takes over as he walks up to you and you fight to get on your feet. With ease he keeps you down before unzipping his pants and allowing his already hardening cock to hang before you. He grabs the back of your hair pulling your head towards him.

“This is what happens when you anger me darling, I don't think you’re going to enjoy this as much as I am” he forces himself inside your mouth. Immediately you struggle to breathe as his girth overwhelms you. Suddenly he begins fucking your throat, the sensation is overwhelming, fear and pain dominating all your senses. Fast and violently he repeatedly slams his cock into the back of your throat gagging and spluttering you can barely stay lucid. After an eternity of this his movements become more erratic and he can barely contain his moans of pleasure. Without warning he cums down your throat before removing himself from your throat and slamming a hand across your face blocking your nose as well. “Swallow” tears cloud your eyes as you do what he asks. “There we go. Don't you feel better now?” you want to scream in his face but you know that would only anger him more. “I need to attend to some business. You will wait here in this room until I return.”

He leaves without even looking at you, leaving you a sobbing mess on the floor. Even if you had control of your body you are too exhausted to move. Hours passed while you stayed on the floor near the bed your mind wanders to the avengers. Would you ever get back to them, would they forgive you, would they believe that Loki was controlling you. You had to push the thoughts from your mind as it was becoming too much to handle.

You stay lying on the floor until you hear Loki return. “Good girl” he motions for you to come to him and you oblige, he holds you in a hug before pulling you into the bed. You lie with him until you fall asleep. Your dreams are peaceful at night and you wonder how long it will be before Loki abuses you again.


	7. Desperate

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The true extent of Loki's control over you is revealed

The nightmares you experience while asleep are nothing compared to the living hell Loki puts you through. He can make you do anything, and at night, he can make you see anything. For weeks It was torture. Until, It wasn't.

This morning it all changed. Loki wakes you up with a kiss to your forehead “morning sweetheart” His presence doesn’t fear you like you know it should, instead it’s calming and reassuring. You feel yourself snuggle up to him but it’s not against your will, you want to. He wraps his arm around you and for the first time in weeks you feel safe. You stare into his eyes getting lost in them for a few moments before his voice brings you back to reality. “how are you” holding his gaze for a moment you answer honestly.

“I feel, good” you have to think about your response for a second but you do truly mean it, something has changed within you and the worst part is, you don’t even mind.

“that's great to hear” he leans in for a kiss, his lips are soft and sweet as he pulls away you want desperately to taste him again but you settle for resting your head against his chest. Looking back on the past few weeks with Loki you can't bring yourself to remember them with anything but fondness, he had rescued you from, the Avengers. Even thinking about them fills you with rage. No. Hate. It took you a second to remember why you were feeling this hate it was almost as though the thought flipped a switch in your mind that you couldn’t control. Suddenly memories that you couldn't quite place came rushing into your mind. The Avengers mistreating you, Tony taking you from your parents and not letting you see them, Peter forcing you to be with him. something about these memories seems off they seem too vivid almost as if they were a dream, they had to be real though right. “What are you thinking about dear?” he voice is like music to your ears as he offers you a big smile.

“The Avengers”

“oh” he sounds taken back by your words as he strokes your cheek with his hand. “it’s best not to dwell on the past darling, you’re safe now and there is so much we have to do today”

you spend another hour in bed with Loki before he jumps out and makes breakfast for you both. When you are finished eating he washes up and sits before you at the table. “Today Y/N we are going to have to break into the avengers compound and take back something they took from me.”

“how are we going to do that, isn’t it heavily guarded” he waves his finger at your face as you ready yourself for his plan.

“We shall sneak in undetected, you know the lay out so it will not be too hard, come on my darling we will leave momentarily” he stands up and takes your hand, leading you outside. Before too long a white flash envelops you both and suddenly you’re standing on the woods on the perimeter of avengers compound. You crouch down with Loki behind some bushes. “you ready” he asks before you sneak from the bushes you see Tony and Peter walking just a few paces from the bush you were in. the shock of seeing them causes you to involuntarily gasp. Fuck, they heard you. Their heads dart to the bush and Loki grabs your arm steading you as he suddenly stands up forcing you up with him. your eyes lock with the two men as they stare at you in disbelief. Rage fills your entire body as Loki releases your arm and you sprint towards them.

“Y/N!” Peter’s voice a mix of fear anger and sadness.

“Take them out Y/N” Loki barely had to speak the words as you were already cocking your fist to attack. In a moment Tony had gotten his suit to manifest around him and was moving toward you. You hit Peter in the jaw as Tony pushes you from him.  
  
“Y/N stop this, why are you doing this” Tony pleads with you but his voice only fills you with a deep hatred that builds from deep within you.

“You did this to me!” you yell back in his face as you kick Peter in the stomach but as you regain your balance Tony pins your arms behind you back and pulls you to the ground. You look up to try to find Loki in hopes that he will save you but you can’t see him, the only evidence of his presence the white flash dissipating through the trees.

“Take her inside” Disgust fills his voice as the rest of the Avengers show up to help Peter and take you into their custody.

Bucky hoists you up from your arms causing you to groan in pain as he leads you towards the compound. You struggle against his grasp manging to partially loosen his grip and turn to fight him off but before you can lunge towards him he punches you in the face knocking you out cold, as you collapse to the ground you hear him say something “Sorry doll”

When you come to again you find yourself tied to a bed in one of the prisoner containment rooms. Tony, Bucky and Thor surround the bed. “Let me go!” you scream and struggle to break free from the restraints but it’s no use.

“What happened, why did you break Loki out and attack Peter” Tony questions you as he places his hand on the bed.

“He rescued me, from you”

“Y/N what are you talking about” Genuine concern flashes across his face.

“You all abused me, Loki saved me” Thor grasps Tony’s arm and drags him out of the room and you only just catch what he says as they exit.

“I think I know what’s going on” Only Bucky remains in the room with you, his intense gaze leaving you on edge.

“This isn’t you” You’ve never seen him look so hurt before it's almost as if he cares, but you know that isn’t true because you have memories of him ignoring you and treating you like dirt.

“Leave me alone. I hate you!” He turns to the door and solemnly walks out, as the silence envelops the room you manage to hear a bit of Tony and Thor’s conversation.

“It has to be that, He is inside her mind” Thor’s voice barely registers as you begin to drift asleep on the bed.

**_Your eyes adjust to the darkness and you make out Loki’s figure in front of you, Running up to him you wrap your arms around his body and he pulls you into a hug. “I’m sorry about that darling, I didn't think they would be able to capture you, but I promise, I’m coming to get you just stay strong”_ **

****

**_“I will” You cling to him tightly wishing you could wake up and truly be in his arms again. But for now you had to find a way to escape the Avengers._ **


	8. Hopeless

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Avengers try to break Loki's control over your mind

As you sleep the avengers discuss their plans across the compound. Tony and Thor lead the meeting as the others sit around the table. Tony begins. “Tell them what you told me Thor”

“As you know Loki is capable of playing with the minds of those around him” Thor begins explaining but before he can continue Bucky quickly interjects

“and you think that's what he has done to Y/N”

“That's the working theory” Tony continues “We don't know how he has done it and we don’t know what we can do to undo it”

“Well we have to try something” Peters voice almost breaks as he speaks up. Tony turns to him and begins to explain their plan.

“Right now I think the best thing we can do for Y/N is to make sure that she is surrounded by her friends, we have to remind her that we are not the bad guys Loki has told her we are. The sooner we start the better anyone up to it should follow me into her room now” Tony is followed by everyone.

You’re jolted awake as you hear the avengers enter the room. They’re all here. You fight against the restraints in an attempt to free yourself from your captors. “Let me go!” you yell as they approach you. Tony places a hand on your restrained arm as you try to flinch away.

“Y/N we are your friends we are here to help” His voice fills you with fear, you try desperately to pull you arm from his grasp but it’s no use.

“You aren’t my friends, you have kidnaped me and now you're holding me hostage” you voice is cold and your words cause the avengers to exchange worried glances among themselves. Peter walks up to you from the opposite side from Tony, with tears in his eyes he begins to speak.

“What did he do to you, please Y/N”

“Get away from me I Hate you” you snap back as Peter retreats away from you. You long for Loki to rescue you, to save you from the Avengers.

“Y/N That's enough, you have to snap out of this now we don’t know what Loki did to you or told you but he lied” Tony’s voice rings in your ears as a voice you recognise as your own comes out of your mouth.

“You’re the liar, you told me I belonged here but you took me from my real family and forced me to do your dirty work, You tricked all of us into following you but the truth is you are a bad person exploiting us for your own selfish gain” Suddenly you are filled with adrenaline and you manage to tear through the restraints, you lunge towards Tony who is still taken back by you words. Before you can even reach him to attack he swings his fist towards you face hitting you on the jaw before slamming his hand into your throat throwing you back down onto the bed.

“Shut up, Shut up!” He breathes heavily as everyone in the room processes the events that transpired. Your face throbs with pain as Tony’s hand tightly coiled around your neck prevents you from breathing. The other avengers remain frozen as you struggle to breathe. Tony’s eyes remain locked onto yours projecting nothing but aggression and anger. Peter runs up and tries to push him off you but Tony won’t budge.

“Mr stark, let go of her” something in Peters tone seems to break through to him and he finally releases you as you instinctively draw in a huge breath. “Someone tie her back down, stronger this time”. Tony walks out of the room followed by everyone except Peter and Bucky. Bucky moves quickly to fix your restraints as Peter sits on a chair next to the bed. “I’m sorry, I don't know what Loki did to you but I promise we are going to fix it”. You try to speak but your throat is still recovering from Tony’s grasp. Peter tries to stroke your face with his hand but you flinch out of his way shooting him a mean glare.

“Come on Peter, Let’s go” Bucky’s voice seems to break Peter from his trance and he slowly walks out of the room. After he leaves Bucky comes back in and sits in the chair next to your bed silently. He sits there for a while before he speaks. “Y/N you are strong, I know you can fight this, and I know that deep down you know that Loki has fed you nothing but lies. His powers may be difficult to overcome but you are stronger than his lies and we are all here for you and we are going to get you through this” He doesn't wait for your response, instead he leaves the room allowing you to consider his words alone.

You knew in your heart that Bucky was wrong, he was just trying to manipulate you. The only thing you knew ‘deep down’ was that Loki was the only one you could trust, you have to find a way back to him. whatever it takes. You find yourself in tears at the day’s events your jaw still aching and your throat fighting for every strangled gasp. You close your eyes hoping to drift quickly to sleep but you find that sleep seeks to elude you tonight leaving you bound and desperately alone in a place that you used to call your home but now could only bring up bad emotions that you couldn't even explain. After what seems like hours of quiet sobbing you manage to fall asleep.

**_As you drift into a dream you look around for Loki anticipating his arrival, you head darts from side to side increasingly frantically as you quickly spin around trying to find him. You start screaming for him but there is no response the only sound you hear is the echoing of your calls from the ever expanding black landscape before you. Where is he. Your shouts grow more desperate and you burst into tears. Suddenly something grasps your shoulder and you quickly turn hoping to see Loki but instead you see nothing. You continue shouting for Loki and you feel something grab your shoulder again this time it feels like it is pulling you out of your dream begging you to follow it. You call again for Loki and this time the force on your shoulder pulls you from your dream back into reality._ **

****

You look to your side and see Peter. “good you're awake” He notes the puzzled expression on your face before explaining that you were calling out for Loki while you slept.

“Get away from me” He takes a step back and turns to look at the door. “Go, Get out” He scrunches up his eyes as if he is building up the courage to say something but he decides against it and walks out leaving you alone once again. Before too long you manage to find your way back asleep.

**_This time Loki is waiting right there for you when you open your eyes. He pulls you into a hug and which says everything you need to hear. It tells you that everything is going to be all right. You say nothing at all._ **


	9. Your plan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After being held captive by the Avengers for many days you decide it time for an escape plan.

After days of dealing with your constant escape attempts the avengers keep you captive in a more intense cell. The walls seem to be some sort of orange force field that you don't want to risk walking into. The low hum keeps you up at all hours and seems to drill into your brain. Every few hours one of the avengers stands on the outside of your cell and attempts to initiate conversation, you never respond.

Thor makes his way to you today, he walks up to your cell and just stares at you for what seems like an eternity. The silence drives you crazy and you can’t stand the way he looks at you as if you are damaged and broken. “What do you want” you try to sound as menacing as possible but you feel your voice betraying you.

“Y/N I need you to tell me exactly what my brother told you” you quickly turn away from him trying to block out his words. “How did he get into your head, please, just tell me” Your eyes are suddenly locked onto his, you can’t seem to pull yourself away.

“No, I-… I can’t” you fold your arms across your chest trying your best to protect yourself from Thor’s gaze.

“Y/N, my brother has fogged your brain with his tricks and mischief”

“SHUT UP! you’re lying you don’t know what you’re talking about. Get out! Leave me alone”

“Y/N please”

“GO!” slowly he retreats from the room leaving you alone once again.

You slide down the edge of the cell to the floor and rest your head on your knees trying to think of any way out of this hell. 

No matter how hard you thought you couldn't come up with any escape plans. Then it hit you. What would Loki do, and at that moment your answer literally walks through the door.

Peter

He walks up to your cage you make sure not to move from your present position.

“Y/N” He looks down at you with genuine pain in his eyes, you can use that.

“Please Peter, I can’t” you look up at him and it doesn't take much effort to bring fake tears to your eyes. “You hate me” you make your breathing rapid and shallow. He seems to buy it.

“Y/N no one here hates you, we want to help you. Please Y/N, let me help you” he stands closer to the cell with tears building in his eyes, this is how you know it is time to enact your plan.

“I can see now, Loki just lied to me he showed me all these fake memories I’m sorry Peter, I love you” you really turn on the water works now letting out choked sobs every now and then.

“I’m so glad you have come to your senses, I love you too”

“Peter?”

“Yes Y/N”

“Can I have a hug, Please” He looks hesitant but it’s clear that he is too weak to resist you. cautiously he unlocks the cage and steps in neglecting to close the door behind him leaving your path to freedom practically unguarded. He wraps you up in a hug which feels familiar yet somehow fills you with disgust. Suddenly the reflection off some metal catches your eye, after closer examination you see that it's a blade in his pocket. This is going to be easier than you thought. still enclosed in his arms you stealthily reach for the knife before taking it and plunging it into his back. His grip around you loosens as he slides to the floor. His expression never changes as blood seeps out from under him. He makes no attempt to stop your escape as you turn towards the open entrance to the cell. You don’t look up from his eyes when during your exit when you suddenly run into Tony. Fuck.

He sees Peter on the floor writhing in pain and the knife in your hands for a moment you both stand still. He pushes you aside to rescue Peter. “Go” Tony’s voice is cold and you freeze to process his words. “Leave, you’re too far gone just go”. You take one last glance at Peter and watch as his breathing slows.

It doesn’t take much for you to escape the compound it all flashes past in a blur you assume that Tony must have told the other avengers to let you go because you don’t run into any of them. On the outskirts of the compound you see a white flash only a short distance from where you are. Instinctively you run towards it and then you see him. He holds out his arms and you find your place within them. 

“You found me darling, I knew you could” Loki kisses your forehead and for the first time in many days you feel safe but you still can’t shake the image of Peter’s body lying in a pool of his own blood while his life slips from him. You didn’t know if he had survived and you knew that you shouldn’t care. You don't care. Right?. You push the feeling aside for now and just enjoy your new found freedom by hugging Loki even tighter. Soon you are surrounded by the familiar white flash and are transported back to Loki and yours’ cabin. He takes your hand and leads you inside, the interior is unchanged since you were last there the bed sheets seem identical to when you left.

He leads you to the bed before gripping both of your arms tightly and turning your torso towards him. “Now darling I’m sorry about this part but I need to know if they got into your head” his words shock you, did he not trust you. Even though you are slightly offended you feel yourself being compelled to answer.

“They tried to turn me against you, they told me you lied and filled my head with deceptions” His expression softens.

“And do you believe them?”

“no”


	10. The first day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's flashback time.
> 
> On your first day at the avengers compound you make a strong connection with two members of your new family.

Today’s the day, you are finally moving onto the avengers compound after Tony recruited you for the avengers. He had seen the way you defended yourself after a run in with a few unsavoury characters that tried to rob you and he had watched you for weeks following the incident. He noted your unnatural strength for your size and how quickly you were able to move. At first you refused his offer citing that you didn't think you were at all qualified for the position and he had probably made a mistake. To prove the legitimacy of his thoughts he threw a punch at you, not a very hard one but hard enough to set your lightning fast reflexes into action and you practically sent him flying across the room. You apologised profusely though he only laughed saying that you had proved his point.

It had taken him three more weeks to convince you promising you a good safe life and an apartment on the compound, this was good as you were already struggling to pay your rent and you were unsure how many more weeks you had before you were homeless. Again.

Here you were, the huge path leading to the facility lay before you it’s cold concrete almost freezing your feet as you tried to move forward until suddenly you were completely frozen unable to go any further. What the hell were you doing here, you were nobody, you had no powers, the people beyond those gates were gods, superheroes and trained assassins. You were nothing.

As you stand frozen you notice your hands shaking like leaves you feel your chest tighten as your breath leaves your body. Just as you start to think how you will ever get out of this situation you feel a large presence behind you which snaps you out of your panic. You quickly turn around to see whoever is behind you, you don't recognise his face but his metal arm tells you that you are face to face with the winter fucking solider you try to open your mouth to speak but shock seems to overtake you.

“You must be Y/N, Tony said you were coming in today. Although, he said you would be in 30 minuets ago” His voice calms you and you allow yourself to relax more fully.

  
“Yeah well, to tell you the truth, I’m frickin terrified I don't know why I accepted Tony’s offer.” The super solider smiles at you and you start to feel ready for what lies ahead.

“There’s no need to be scared Y/N we all look out for each other here, you may have already heard of me but I’m James“ He gives a little laugh before continuing “But everyone calls me Bucky. You've got absolutely nothing to worry about, would you like me to accompany you inside”

“Thank you, Bucky I would love that” He leads you in and what only moments ago was terrifying now felt right and secure. Like you were going home.

Bucky helps you get settled and shows you around the facility. “This is my favourite room” He says with a smile as you both enter the training room.

“I’ve never seen a room so massive and decked out before” You stand in amazement at the huge room as Bucky confidently walks in.

“Well, what are you waiting for, are you ready?”

“Ready for what”

“Your first training session of course!” Bucky quickly pulls on a pair of boxing pads and beckons you to the centre of the room.

“What are you doing I-” You couldn't continue your sentence as you burst out laughing as the reality of your new position in the avengers dawns on you. You were about to get your ass kicked by a super solider.

“Come on, let’s see how hard you can hit” giving in you walked over to the man that towered above you and decided to humour him.

Trying not to embarrass yourself you put as much strength as you can behind your punch, as you hit you make sure to follow through and you prepare yourself for Bucky to laugh at your pathetic attempt. Instead, he looks at you with fondness in his eyes and speaks.

“Wow, Tony was right about you, with my training you’re gonna go far kid” He must be insane right? There’s nothing special about you, there never has been.

Ever since you can remember you were always the smallest and you were relentlessly picked on for it. On the occasions where it got physical you never felt able to fight back but when you did you could to stand up to even the biggest of opponents.

“You don't mean that, don't be ridiculous” you were almost laughing at this point obviously there was a mistake and someone was playing a joke on you.

“Listen to me Y/N, you’re here for a reason, we all have a role to play here and I know that with time you will make a great asset for the team. Just give it a chance, okay?” though not entirely convinced you decide you should give it a go.

“Okay”

“Great, let’s get started then”

Bucky put you through your paces for what felt like hours, but you never tired. While you were working on core strength with him another man walked into the room.

Immediately you were drawn to him, his brown hair dancing across his face as he strode confidently into the room. He looks younger than Bucky, around your age, he was maybe 21 if you had to guess. He must be Peter parker, you had seen him all over the news for years. He was always your favourite avenger and you couldn't deny you had a MASSIVE crush on him. you lock eyes and he gives you a shy smile before Bucky grabs your arm and brings you back to reality.

“I wouldn't go there if I were you, Tony has a strict no in team dating and you can't hide anything from him. trust me”

“I- uh I wasn't, I would never” you could barely get the words to form Bucky only chuckled at you while you were hoping that Peter hadn’t heard over heard your conversation.

“Sure you weren’t, now. Back to training”

The rest of your session went by quickly Peter had left after doing some weight training for thirty minutes. How could there possibly be this much training for you to do on your first day was all you could think, wasn't there other stuff for you to be doing, you haven’t even met anyone else yet.

Almost as if he can sense your thoughts Bucky suddenly stops instructing you and begins packing up.

“that's enough for today, go explore the compound and I’m sure tony will want to speak with you before the day is out”

“Thanks for making me feel so welcome Bucky” you say lifting an arm to wave goodbye.

“Oh and one more thing” cautiously you turn to face him.

“I’ll see you here tomorrow morning 6am”

as you leave the room you hear the sounds of the super solider attacking a punching bag. Was he not done training yet? Does the man ever rest? Before you could answer these questions you felt something grab your arm and pull you into an empty hallway.

Peter.

His warm brown eyes dangerously close to yours as his hand lingers on your arm for what feels like an eternity. He removes his hand and smiles at you.

“you must be Y/N, I’m Peter but you probably know me as-”

“Spider man!” you interrupt internally kicking yourself for acting like such a fan girl.

“haha yes, Welcome to the compound. I saw you training with Bucky today. You’re a lot stronger than you look aren't you” His gaze never left yours while he spoke and his smile never faded. “Tony mentioned you were coming today, but he forgot to mention how beautiful you are” his words leave you speechless, was he really talking to you?

“Peter, I-” unable to speak you stand there frozen until suddenly you hear footsteps march down the hallway adjacent to the one you and Peter are in and you hear Tony’s voice humming a tune. You quickly turn to walk out into the hallway but before you can make it out Peter grabs hold of your arms and plants a kiss on your check.

“to be continued” he says with a small chuckle.

You emerge from the hallway practically running into Tony as you round the corner.

“Ah! Y/N just the girl I wanted to see” Too flustered by the last 30 seconds you wait for Tony to speak again. “How have you been settling in, I hope Bucky didn't work you too hard. I told him to go for a light session today but that man can be a bit, well, extreme”

“haha, he sure can be but I think I kept up with him well enough, also I think I’m settling in pretty well, can’t wait to see what the future holds for me here”

  
“Me too Y/N, I think this is the start of a excellent new chapter for you”

Tony finished up the rest of your orientation showing you parts of the compound that Bucky had missed on his initial tour and he finalised all of your documents. By the time he was done it was quite late so you decide to go to your room and get some rest.

To your surprise you see Peter waiting for you outside you room.

“Y/N, welcome home” he says with a smile. “it’s nice to see you again, I hope we can continue our earlier conversation somewhere more, private” you had to stop yourself from fainting on the spot, is this really happening.

“I hope so too”

“well, aren’t you going to invite me in” a smirk forming a across his face as he finished. Tentatively you open the door inviting him in. you both sit on the end of the huge bed placed in the middle of the massive room against the wall.

“Tell me about your family” he asks placing a hand on your thigh.

“Isn’t that a little heavy for practically our first conversation?” it's not that you don’t want to tell him about your family you just think that the subject will darken the atmosphere.

“I don't think so, I wanna get to know all about you and what lead you to the avengers” letting your guard down you decide to tell him.

“Well I never knew my father, I was told he died before I was born” His face drops and he gives you an apologetic look. “And I don't know what happened to my mother she either died in childbirth or gave me up immediately after, the orphanage would never give me a straight answer and although I’ve looked for her I’ve never found her so I assume it was the former. I stayed at that orphanage until I was 16 when I ran away and lived in a tent city for a few months before I managed to rent a dirt cheap apartment with a fake id, and that brings us up to now.”

“Y/N I’m, I’m so sorry”

“It’s okay, it made me a stronger person and I now know that I can look after myself no matter what happens” He wraps his arm around you and immediately you feel safe in a way you haven’t felt in your life before this moment. You begin to feel your life changing for the better.


End file.
